Chapter 4 - A Better Daydream

"Hey, Sally?"

I looked up from my duties of logging in the newly returned books and smiled as Zell peeked his head around the frame of the library entry. My heart fluttered. "Hi, Zell. On your way to class?"

"Yeah. Say. You takin' lunch soon?"

"Uh-huh."

Zell motioned down the hall. "Could you take it now? I kind of need ya. Can you come to the Training Center?"

Heart aflutter-- "Sure, Zell. I'll meet you there."

He winked at me. "Thanks, Meg. I appreciate it." Then he disappeared.

I smiled and giggled as I logged out and called out "Valerie! I'm going on lunch!"

"Okay!" came her shout from the back.

I slipped off the chair and straightened my hair into my braid as I exited the library into the side-hall. Zell needs me for class? It could mean anything. Sparring example. Offense. Defense. Don't do. Do. Or he could want to show off 'Quick Silver'. It made me feel awesome.

I turned into the main corridor and headed toward the Training Center. Students continued to file down the side-hall, which made my nervousness soar, but I kicked and pushed it away. He needs me! Yet another daydream that had become a reality.

Candidates sent me sidelong glances as I turned into the side-hall toward the Training Center. I sent them timid smiles, and even the occasional 'hello', and continued forward. Most of them probably recognized me from how ever long I'd been sneaking into Zell's class. At least now I have a reason to be here. Of course, I'd always had a reason. It just had been a little on the 'stalker' side. And now they would all see that I could be there on purpose. That... That made me feel great. I didn't need to lurk or hide. I could stand in front of the whole class and--

I froze, the smile vanishing. In front of the whole class. Whole class? I sent a sidelong glance to a candidate that passed on my left and cleared my throat. I stepped off to the right and gnawed my lower lip as I clenched and unclenched my hands. Sally, he needs you. And he would never humiliate you. Remember what he said when he first started training you?

More candidates passed, making the Thrustaevis turn into Bahamut and all his cousins. I groaned and whimpered as I stomped my feet. Sally Regal! You get in there and help your boyfriend! And I forced my feet down the hall after the last candidate rushing to class. This is Zell. Zell. He won't do anything mean. He promised. Before. Remember? I slightly nodded, still worrying my lower lip as I entered the outer area of the Training Center.

Zell had just finished roll-call.

I hung back until Zell's gaze met my terrified one. He smiled, winked, and motioned me forward. I forced my feet to move, hands tightly fisted. "Okay everyone," he said in the Instructor-like tone I'd heard before. "Now I'm gonna show you what I've been talking about these past couple weeks."

I moved to stand across from Zell, my eyes never wavering from his face. You can do this, Sally.

Zell continued to address the class. "Balance and coordination go hand-in-hand with every aspect of not only fighting, but getting from point A to point B. If you don't have balance, or if one part of your body doesn't know how to move with the rest, how are you going to keep your ass from landing in the dust? It doesn't matter if your specialty is Duel, nunchaku, or machine gun. You've got to know how to make everything work together."

Zell faced me then and immediately gave me a wink that seemed to say 'It's okay.'

I set my stance as I sent him a timid smile.

Zell crossed his arms and gestured to me with a lift of his chin. "Someone push her over."

I blinked, but my focus didn't move from Zell's twinkling blue eyes. We'd practiced on this every day since starting to work out together. It was part of our warm-up routine. Zell said I had nearly perfect balance, and that was why the quarterstaff had been all wrong. It had tipped the scale of my natural balance and been too gangly for me to incorporate into my 'body', as it were.

"Seriously?" a young man asked, candidates muttering and whispering around him.

Zell faced them. "Seriously. If you can get her butt in the dirt, I'll dismiss you all early."

The whispering and muttering rose in volume, and I could feel myself relax. Why? Because if Zell made a statement like that, it meant he didn't think they could do it. It meant he thought... he knew I was that good. And that made me see stars.

"Anything goes?" another man asked.

Zell raised an eyebrow. "Don't push it, Cord."

The young man stood... and the muttering and whispers stopped. I didn't move my focus from Zell or from my balance.

"I just have to make the little thing fall down?"

"Yup," Zell acknowledged slowly.

I vaguely heard footsteps and slightly adjusted my stance when my peripheral vision registered the height and mass of the shadow that approached. Just like all the other training sessions in the 'Monster's Lair' of the Training Center. The person walked around behind me, giving a slight push here and a bit of a firmer shove there, much as Zell had that first day and each consecutive practice after. My stance and balance shifted with each one, only allowing a slight lean this way and that.

Then the man started feignting pushes in one area and doing them in another. My muscles and center of gravity shifted each time, keeping me balanced and on my feet with not even a single bawble--

The man moved to kick my feet out from under me, and I instantly reacted with a backflip. Then I set my stance again, my eyes focusing on Zell's. His eyes twinkled and his lips twitched upward.

"Cord, sit. Next?"

No one stepped forward, but one voice way in the back said "You do it."

The entire class laughed.

Zell pushed his lips to one side as he regarded me. "Hm."

I swallowed hard. Zell, don't you dare!

"You up for it?" he asked.

No! "Sure." Zell!

Zell gave a slight nod and lowered his arms to his side as he began that dreaded circle around me. "Okay. Let's give it a go."

I swallowed harder, adjusting my stance as I dragged my focus back and kept it there... Relax, Sally. It's no different than before. Relax... I released a slow breath.

"Good girl," Zell whispered.

I smiled.

Zell worked me harder on my balance than he ever had. The candidates cheered and chanted me on after the first two minutes without a bawble. And when five minutes was called out, they were a pretty rowdy bunch. Clapping, chanting, cheering, whistling, and who knew what else. I was getting a little sweaty and a little tired, but I kept my focus. I kept my stance. And I kept my balance.

Finally, Zell laughed and gave me a playful shove. "You win, Sally. Good job."

And the candidates roared and applauded.

Zell faced them as he wrapped an arm around my shoulers. "You see? Balance. Coordination. You get those and everything will pop. So you do those exercises I gave you. No bitching and no excuses." Zell faced me. "Thanks, Meg. You can scoot now."

I timidly smiled and whispered "Okay" as I turned and made my way back to the side-hall and the main corridor and eventually the library. The only thing I remembered was Zell's laugh and his praise.

"Hey, Meg."

I looked up from my duty of entering new books into the system and smiled as Zell entered. "Hi." He'd recently taken a shower, so his cheeks were a bit red and his hair hadn't dried all the way. But his spike was just as adorable as ever.

He leaned against the counter. "Thanks for helping out, Meg. I really appreciate it."

I flushed. "You're welcome, Zell. I'm glad I could do it." And I'm really glad I didn't humiliate you.

Zell picked at the counter, his focus on the finger doing the deed. "I know you were scared to death," he confessed. He peeked up at me. "I wouldn't have done it if I didn't think you could handle it. You know that... right?"

I lowered my gaze to the book in my hand. "Yes." And thank you for making sure, sweetie.

Zell released a deep breath. "Oh. Okay."

I looked at him from under my lashes. He caught my glance and grinned. I giggled and looked away. You're so cute. And I flushed molten.

"So..." Zell leaned against the counter even more as he tried to look over my shoulder at the monitor. "Whatcha doin'?"

I lifted the book in my hand. "I'm putting these," I pointed to the monitor, "into the system so that they'll be available for everyone to check out by tomorrow."

"What all do you have to do to do that?"

I blinked. "W-What?"

Zell came around to stand behind my chair. I tilted my head back to gaze up at him as he motioned to the monitor. "What do you do to get them in there?"

I continued to blink up at him, completely floored.

He met my gaze. "What?"

"Y-You really... You really want to know?" I asked in a hushed voice.

"Well sure. Why not?"

"I... It's just... It's just that it's not very exciting."

"So?"

"So... So won't you be bored?"

"Trying to figure out how you do your job? Tch! Whatever!" Zell turned my chair around to face the monitor. Then he leaned close, his hand on my right shoulder as he prompted "So you do what now?"

I smiled and released a dreamy sigh before beginning the step-by-step process. "Well, each book has a unique number that it's given when published." I opened the book in my hand and showed the number on the inside of the front binding.

"And you put those in there?" Zell asked, reaching across to point at a specific place on the monitor.

"Uh-huh. Then-- Here. Let me show you." I typed in the number--

"Dude! Your fingers are flying!"

I giggled and then pointed to the screen. "See? That number is on file because the publisher submits each one to an international database the moment it's assigned. So..." I assigned the library number and location and then saved the information. "Now the publisher will have record that our library has that specific edition of that book."

"How do you get it in to Garden's library file?"

"That's in a sub-menu. Over here." I clicked into the location. "See? It shows the publisher and the edition information over here and then the library location here. Now I just assign the book a Garden number, which the computer gives automatically, and I have the printer..." I swivelled my chair around to the right to retrieve the printed label. Then I turned the rest of the way around to face Zell. He watched with a gorgeous expression of attention. "And this gets put on the binding of the book - like this - and lets me track it electronically."

"Whoa. Cool."

I smiled up at him. "Uh-huh. And if you tried to leave the library without checking it out, I'd know it."

"Seriously?"

I nodded and turned back to the monitor. "Right here. A little window pops up."

"So... You have to tackle anyone?"

I giggled. "No. I just make an announcement over the intercom."

"Cool." Zell leaned close and pointed at a flashing icon. "What's that?"

"That's a book request from a different Garden." This is so cool! "You want to watch me do a book request?" I asked as I looked at his face so close to mine...

Zell met my gaze. "You don't mind?"

I slightly shook my head. "Nuh-uh," I whispered.

Zell smiled, and everything after that was a dreamy fog.

"Hiya, Sally."

I looked up from my book - I'd done all my work, so I was just reading - and sent Selphie a smile as she came to lean against the counter of the library. "Hi."

"I heard Zell showed you off to his class today."

I flushed and absently smoothed the pages of my book. "He just used me as an example for balance and coordination." Zell showed me off! I nearly giggled.

"He showed you off, Sally," Selphie insisted, outwardly giving voice to my inward giggle.

So I surrendered mine. "Okay. He showed me off." I sighed and leaned against the counter. "It was so cool, Selphie."

"I bet," she acknowledged, eyes twinkling. "How'd you do? I heard from Mandy that you were awesome; that you didn't bawble once." Selphie frowned before I could reply. "And what was with Cord doing that little kick thing? Sheesh. I'm going to have a talk with Seifer about that guy. He likes causing problems, and I've already had complaints about him bullying some of the junior classmen."

My eyes widened. "Really? He seemed all show." I blinked and flushed and slapped my hand over my mouth.

Selphie giggled. "Hey. You gotta call it as you see it."

I lowered my hand as I reluctantly smiled. "Did you need a book, Selphie?"

"Nope. I just want you to see something," Selphie confessed.

"Right now?" I looked at my watch. Thirty minutes. "Hey, Val? Can I leave early today? I'll give you an extra 30 for lunch tomorrow."

Val shouted "Sure!" from the back.

I tucked my book beside the computer for the next day and then followed Selphie from the library. "Where are we going?"

"The Quad."

"How come?"

Selphie sent me a secretive smile. "You'll see."

I smiled. "Selphie, you better not be doing any plotting."

"Me? Plotting?" Selphie giggled. "I leave that up to Zelly and Seifer. They're the pranksters."

"Do you think Zell will ever pull a prank on me?" I asked slowly, thoughtfully.

Selphie smiled. "Probably, but nothing horrible." She giggled. "You think everything he does is funny anyway."

I flushed. "It is," I mumbled.

Selphie giggled again. "You guys are so cute."

I flushed darker and adjusted my hold on my duffel. "Thank you," I whispered.

"What's it like being Zell's girlfriend, anyway? He's never had one that I know of."

I cleared my throat. "It's... It's fine."

"Fine?" Selphie laughed and gave me a scolding shove. "'Fine', she says to me."

I timidly smiled. "Okay. So it's wonderful," I admitted. "Everything I dreamed and more."

"No spats?"

This time I giggled. "Selphie, we've only been dating for a few days."

"So? I've heard horror stories of boyfriend/girlfriend relationships lasting less time than that because of a stupid argument."

My smile vanished. "R-Really?"

"Uh-huh."

I stared down at my feet as they moved along the corridor toward the Quad. "Oh."

"Of course, they weren't nearly as cute as you two. And the guy wasn't as laid back as Zell at all. The girl wasn't as devoted, either. So... Forget it."

I looked over at Selphie. "What did they fight about?"

Selphie shrugged. "Don't remember, but I think it was something pretty stupid."

"Oh." We haven't fought about anything... have we? We'd had the little disagreement about the active SeeD thing after the field exam, but that hadn't been a fight... Was it?

We turned in to the side-hall leading into the Quad.

"Sally."

"Hmm?" I responded as I absently looked over at Selphie.

"Do you remember me telling you about the party we threw for Squall when he got the promotion of Commander for Balamb Garden?"

I nodded and wistfully smiled. "I wish I could have gone, but I could only watch from Garden. Candidates weren't allowed ashore."

Selphie smiled. "Sorry you missed it. It was great. And you know what?"

I slightly shook my head, vaguely hearing the sound of a guitar as she and I descended the stairs into the Quad. "What?"

"Zell played guitar."

My mouth dropped open. "He did? I didn't know that!"

Selphie nodded. "I know. He doesn't play for anyone anymore. I guess someone made a comment - I think it was Quistis - about how he was off the beat or something. She didn't mean to offend him. She just thought he'd want to know."

My lower lip trembled. "Poor Zell."

"I know. He's already so hard on himself about certain stuff. Anyway..." She halted at the bottom of the second flight of steps and faced me. "Anyway," she said again, "he doesn't play except for when he's by himself. So, I thought you'd want to know."

I smiled. "Thank you, Selphie. I'll have to see if I can get him to play for me. I sing a little."

Selphie's eyes brightened. "Really? Cool. You guys could do duets."

I vigorously shook my head. "No. I don't sing good in front of people."

Selphie kept smiling. "Okay, then I'll leave." She motioned ahead. "Just sing for Zell."

I blinked. "W-What?"

Selphie pointed again toward the stage on the Quad. "Over there. Zell. Guitar." I turned and Selphie gave me a gentle push. "Go."

And so I did what I was told, walking stiffly down the last flight of stairs as my gaze focused on Zell sitting on the edge of the stage playing the guitar and not really paying attention to anything else. I swallowed hard and-- Zell glanced my direction and stopped playing.

"Oh." He lowered the guitar to his lap and stared down at it, his ears going red. He cleared his throat and sent me a collection of glances as I continued toward him. "Hey, Sally. You're off work early."

I pushed myself up onto the stage beside him. Then I smiled and gave him a nudge. "How come you didn't tell me you could play?"

He shrugged and adjusted the guitar on his lap to pick a couple notes and then a couple chords. He sent me a glance. "I don't know."

I motioned to the guitar. "That's really pretty," I offered softly. "Can you play some more?"

"Sure."

"Do you mind if I hum along?"

Zell looked at me. "You sing?"

I giggled and flushed. "Not very often. Usually when I'm by myself with the radio on."

Zell grinned. "I can barely carry a tune in a bucket."

I smiled at him before giving another nudge. "But you play guitar really good, Zell."

Zell looked away, again picking a collection of chords as the red of his ears moved to his neck and face. "Thanks." He cleared his throat. "So... What songs you know?"

I scooted a little closer, careful not to bump the guitar, and watched his profile with a soft smile. "You know 'Eyes on Me'?"

Zell smiled and started picking out the melody.

It was like the song had been written just for me.

And then Zell quieted the guitar and looked over at me. "Wow, Sally. That was really... It was like... Like it was your song."

I flushed and focused on my gently swinging feet as my hands gripped the edge of the stage. "I've always liked that song," I whispered. Because I could so relate to it. "It's a classic love long, and it's been around for years. I think my mom has the original performance album."

"Wow. Cool." Zell watched me a bit longer before moving his gaze to the guitar and absently plucking another nameless melody.

I continued to softly smile, basking in the surreal loveliness of everything and enjoying every sappy and mushy thought and daydream that went through my head. Then I let myself do something I never thought would happen, I rested my head on Zell's shoulder as he continued to play. I closed my eyes and released a deep breath, hoping against hope that my alarm didn't go off until the dream was finished and I had my one last kiss.

Hey. It could happen, couldn't it?

So when the alarm didn't go off, and Zell kept playing, and the evening sun put a warm glow on my face... I started to hum along with whatever he did. I didn't care if it fit or didn't, it was fun to just do something with Zell that didn't need to mean anything. It was romantic just hanging out because I hadn't ever thought it would happen. And now it was and... and... and I didn't know what to think or feel about anything.

I had a better daydream than all the ones I'd ever written in my journals.

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